If u type How to find chuck Norris on Google and click I'm feeling lucky you will laugh at what it comes up with =)

I'm Feeling Lucky

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried...

I was standing post last night and someone told a Chuck Norris Joke. I guess I've heard that the Army is infatuated with him and I asked them what it was all about. I was stared at with disbelief and for almost a minute trying to decide if I was really that ignorant or if I was trying to pick a fight. Finally, someone spoke up, then they hit me from every direction...
"H-H-H- He's CHUCK NORRIS!!! What do you mean, why do we like him? Have you ever seen a Chuck Norris movie"
"That guy's badder than the illegitimate love child of Curt Russel and Bruce Willis.
When Chuck Norris runs with scissors, other people get hurt...
Chuck Norris is Luke Skywalker's real father...
Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse, horses are hung like Chuck Norris...
He's counted to infinity - twice...
Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because he's afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris...
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Chuck Norris..."

Apparently I had broken some sort of unwritten law and since these guy's all have guns I decided to take another tack and asked them for a few more jokes.

Short story long, I've compiled a list of Norris jokes and will, in theory, be passing them along with each post.

It's starting to get hot out here.
Highs are in the 105 to 107 region. They are only going to go up from here and I have a feeling we're going to be looking back fondly on 105 in a few months.

I was sitting on post during a particularly slow portion of the day today, it was in the morning and all of us there were looking out over the approach to the post while a warm wind whipped down from the north. There was a halfway brewing sandstorm so visibility wasn't very good and for some reason Otis's "Dock of the bay" kept running through my mind.

"WE'RE NUMBER ONE!"

So the guy's in my PCB decided we need to change the room up a little. We all kind of got thrown in here at different times and in different ways and now that we're going to be here a while we decided to make it a little more comfortable. I'd have some before and after pictures, but I lost the cable for my camera and will have to buy a new one before I can put up some pics.

Also, I can now do one handed pullups!!! I look at it as a milestone... I've never been able to do one them before. Of course they're not true one handed pullups as my free hand is clasped around the wrist of the arm doing the pulling, in a nod to fairness though I did my best to only use the one arm.

I was working the other day and a military photographer stopped by...

In other news I ran into a good friend from Japan today while doing laundry. We used to stand a lot of post together and he'd tell me about life in the Philippines. He's about to head home in a month or so but I got his email and told him I'd look him up on my next day off.

Long long day

Man it's been a long week, and we're only on day two. I shot on an Army range today and even though my rifle is shooting a bit high I managed to shoot a 30. Matt's shot the same range and normally gets between 31 and 34. I get to shoot it again tomorrow and am hopeful that I'll at least reach the low end of his range.

Other than that, life is pretty good.

Well, I got here in one piece and walked into the USO just in time to catch the best part of the Superbowl! As you might imagine it was crowded with servicemen (and women) but oddly enough nobody spoke, the place was keenly silent with most of them literally on the edge of their seats as the end of the fourth quarter played out. To me the social interactions going on were even more interesting than the game. Most of the guy's were pro Patriots, but here and there in little pockets you'd have these die-hard Giants fans. The interesting part would happen after a great play when all of New England's fans would be grinding their teeth in disgust while one of the more boysterous New York fans would jump up, fist clenched at the tube and scream "take that suckas!", or other sailor type words to that effect. He did this a couple of times and although nobody ever clobbered him for real, if looks alone could do it he'd have been a goner many times over.
Nothing much else to report on. It's great to be back on a Navy base, although God definitely has a sens of humor about how my class is composed. I'd say 60 percent of my class are officers and another 10 percent are E-7 or higher. Talk about being a Hebrew in Egypt, I haven't tread this lightly since I was in bootcamp surrounded by RDC's. (Navy Drill Sergeants)
At any rate, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Made it!

Well, I've made it to the West Coast and will try to catch the last few minutes of the Giants wiping the field with the Pats...

God bless the Underdog. :D

A steadfast heart is a powerful weapon...

They called me on the 18th to say I'd been selected to participate in an extended exercise and would be away from home for long enough that it only makes sense to cancel my lease and put stuff in storage.

Not sure exactly where I'm going or what I'll be doing, but I've made my mind up to do the job right no matter how long it takes.

On the bright side, at least I'll be in civil temperatures once again.

I'm supposed to get certified for a leader position tomorrow. This will be the third time I have been scheduled to certify, the previous two were canceled because the people who test us didn't have their stuff together. Guess what, they test is computer based and I was told that the system it's on may be down. Strike three, who's out?

Me that's who.

Without these certs I have nothing to put on an evaluation and it looks like I have been here for six months (I will have by the time evals are due) and have managed to avoid actually doing any real work.

O well, I guess it's out of my hands, but I still feel frustrated that I can't just get this stupid thing done and put behind me.

My first niece, Lelia, on the way home from the Hospital!

Also, I have a new toy. The Oculus

Well, my internet is back...

After an Ice Storm earlier last month, my internet has been intermittent at best. Not just my internet, but internet for everyone around me. I'd call in and they'd do all sorts of stuff to test why my computer wasn't connecting, as one tech put it, "to see what I'd done to make it stop working".
I, of course, would fall back on the old, "how does something I did to make it stop working affect my friend in a different building, because it always starts and stops for all of us at the same time." The techs on the phone aren't really technically savy, they just read scripts, so of course they would just smile at me and claim it was my personal router that was causing the issue. At the same time, a different tech would be telling my neighbor the exact same thing about her own wireless router.

Long story short, I called again on Tuesday and a tech proceeded to claim that he could see my modem and computer perfectly, that the modem was working fine and it had to be my router because I swore it was attached but he couldn't find it on my network. I told him I had a telecommunications engineering degree and had been in the field since he was in grade school and that I'd been spoofing mac addresses since you could set them with physical switches on the network cards. I assured him it was my router he was seeing and not my computer, and that in any case it was absolutely insulting to believe that my router was responsible for denial of service to hundreds of customers. I finally snapped and, without cursing, told the tech in no uncertain terms that my neighbors and I were going to make their lives utter hell until they actually dispatched people to look at their half of the network because it had come to a point where it was down more than up.

The next day an actual technician called me and inside of twenty seconds actually came to the conclusion that it was their side of the network and not mine. UREAKA! He made an appointment to come out and when they did discovered that my whole complex was riddled with repeaters sending a bad signal...

I'm glad it's fixed, I just wish it hadn't taken so long.

So I woke up this morning and went about my morning ritual. Halfway across the room, light still off, I heard the unmistakably dribbling... Either my roommate was peeing on the living room carpet whilst standing on the kitchen table, Oooooor a pipe had burst. Weighing the plausibility of one against the other, I hollered for Ken to get off the kitchen table and for God sakes use the head. In answer I received more dribbling and... a snore? Yup, the pipe had burst and Ken was still asleep on the living room couch. I got him up and we got stuff moved out of the way and buckets under the biggest drips then called the maintenance guy's. What can I say, it was an interesting morning.

So there I was, three hours into the counter top method of turkey defrosting, and the bird's still frozen stiff...

I have been invited to a Christmas Eve lunch at the neighbors and was going to make a Turkey to bring. I've never cooked a turkey before, so I asked my neighbor about defrosting it. She said that I shouldn't use the refrigerator method, but should instead put it out on the counter the day before for a few hours and then pop it into the refrigerator. My neighbor usually knows about this stuff so I took her advice, hence my opening sentence.

After a bit of internet sleuthing, I've decided to go with a modified cold water kitchen sink/refrigerator method in order to get the bird ready in time to cook tomorrow morning. I guess what it comes down to is that if defrosting a turkey is the craziest thing in my life right now then I really have no room to complain.

Baaaah!

Word is out on the street at my Church that I'm single and you can about guess where the rest of this rant is going, so I won't even waste my breath articulating it.

In other news, I'm going up for my Air Force Qual Cert. In theory this means that I will be officially able to do the stuff I have already been doing for them unofficially. The actual logic behind why a Navy person is getting an Air Force leader qual it is a bit more convoluted and honestly gives me a headache, but I digress.

My favorite uncle died today. He had been in an accident when he was younger and had suffered massive brain trauma. Honestly, I was told that nobody expected him to live this long. Still, that's a small comfort for the mother and brothers and sisters he left behind.

Also, I've been without power for the last two days as a massive ice storm came through and leveled a lot of the trees which also brought down power and telephone lines. My neighbors and I are trying to make the best of it, two of them have young children. What it's come down to is four families huddled into one apartment, sharing firewood, candles, and food. I spent some time after work tonight picking up fallen tree limbs for use as firewood because they called and said we were running out. Every store in the state is out of firewood, hatchets, axes and the like, but I did manage to pick up a camp saw so at least we have something to break this stuff down with. I had just walked into a Lowes to see if they had any axes hidden anywhere when one of my neighbors called to say that the power was back up. THANK GOD! It had been a long day and I really wanted a hot shower.